Wednesday, July 21, 2010

I thought I Already Conquered This Beast

I'm supposed to slam tonight.

Holy crap.

For those of you who don't know, "slamming" is when you read a poem, or some other piece you have written for an audience (think coffee, berets, and snapping - and only not as steryotypical and cheesey). I have been to this coffee house's open mic night a couple times to watch, and now my best friend is making me get up there and slam.

And I am freaking out!

When I first started this blog, I was pretty nervous - even embarrassed - about posting all of my writings for the world to see, but before long I became more accustomed to it. It even started to feel a little exciting. Now look at me - I love blogging.

But there is something about getting up in front of complete strangers and actually reading something I have written. If it bombs, I will know. There's just no getting around it. I still haven't even decided what I'm going to read; every time I think I have my mind set on a poem, I practice it out loud, and I am then horrified at how it sounds audibly. Not to mention the lack of *spark*. Am I just being extremely self conscious, or have I always sucked this much?

I have no clue what I'm going to do, but I better figure it out lickedy split.
wish me luck.

1 comment:

Jacky Cheng said...

although i don't do slam, i definitely know what you mean about being self-conscious about writing! i'm always reading over my sentences and wondering it sounds good to the ear. i think, sometimes, it's better to just write and not think too much, because that's what i seem to be most genuine and fluid. hell, even if it's not fluid, i think it conveys a stronger message.

keep on writing though! your blog has been pretty fun to read, so i'm sure you'll sound great in front of any audience :)